doyce testerman

Vayland Rd. [5] – The Quest

~ The Quest ~

Twenty minutes later, I was ready for whatever they were going to tell me.

The dwarf and the ogre were looking doubtful.

“I don’t think those work where we’re going.” Brock gestured with some distaste at the gun slung over my left shoulder.

I raised an eyebrow. “You ever shot a gun, Brock?”

The dwarf glared at me, finally shaking his head.

”Then how the hell would you know?”

He shrugged. I ignored him. The gun was an open-sight .300 Savage; a family heirloom that my great-grandfather had bought the year of its making. My grandfather had an alaskan grizzly pelt in his guest bedroom the gun had taken. The stock was solid hardwood with a stainless steel shoulder plate; the barrel was three and a half feet of blued steel. Frankly, if the thing didn’t fire ‘where we were going’, I’d could do worse than just hitting things with it.

Bhuto had a different problem. “Do you not have a more… formidable hand-weapon, Sean?”

I readjusted the grip on my old ‘herding stick’, which I’d found in a barrel of similar tools in the machine shed. I’d cut it from an ash tree when I was thirteen and had used the four-foot club whenever I had to push one of our bulls into a new pasture, on foot.

I could have explained all of that to them, but as far as explanations went, I didn’t really feel like it was my turn.

I motioned towards the trees behind the house. “Let’s just go.”

—-

When we got to the edge of the trees farthest from the farm, Bhuto extended his hand to me for the second time, doing the same for Brock. It was my turn to look doubtful.

”Explanations come shortly, Sean, but we need to move quickly now, when we are not marked by others.” Brock said. ”I can assist with that.”

I almost refused, until I saw Brock’s expression. However uneasy I felt, the dwarf far worse, and part of me wanted to see why. I took the ogre’s hand.

I’m not sure what I was expecting… a puff of smoke, a swirling of my perceptions, maybe. When we just shot off the ground and into the sky without a word or gesture, I couldn’t help but shout.

—-

The night had passed and the clouds had rolled back in on cue.

They come for him not long after and started again.

First they stripped the mud away with blunt fingers, accomplishing in less than a minute what had been denied him through the night. The mass came away in huge chunks, dry and dusty, though it had clung like putty the day before. They finished the cleaning with an orange-tinted liquid that foamed when it hit made the the needles burn all the way down to his joints. Completely clean, his skin had a greyish cast — probably the light from the clouds.

Then they tied him to the tree again and brought a new cauldron of the mud. Packing it back on took most of the day. The tall one watched the whole thing without moving or relaxing its corpse-smile.

Steven never made a sound. Damned if he would.

The worst part of it was when they put him back in the cage.

My cage.

The day ended, the clouds pulled back, the stars came out, and he wondered for the first time if anyone would come.

—-

We landed on a curving stretch of blacktop a few miles away from the farm. Ravines dove away from the road on both sides.

I shook my head. “Why are we here?”

Bhuto looked up at the sky. “This is the only place we could be, Sean. We must reach your father.”

“Oh.” I thought for a second. “You do realize that’s the most pointless, circular answer I’ve ever heard, right? And I went to a liberal arts college.”

Brock advanced toward me as Bhuto sighed. Much to my dismay, he didn’t stop until he was nearly touching me.

”What do you call this road?”

My eyes were watering. I blinked rapidly and focused on the question. “Ahh. Vayland. Vayland Road.” The problem with people telling you to breath through your mouth when around a bad smell is that instead of smelling it, you taste it.

He smiled up at me and I was glad for the darkness that largely hid his teeth. “Why is that?”

”Why is what?”

”Why do they call it that?”

”Because…” I thought about it. “I don’t know why.”

His smile broadened and I had to take a step back. “Let me tell you why.” He turned away from me and threw out his arms. “This place is a border between realms. The very first people who lived here and named things called the people on the other side wa`rii we because they didn’t understand. Others came and gave the border different names. When the people of my lands came,” he thumped his chest “they took the names it had already and translated the words and the idea. They called it a fae land.” His eyes glinted as he turned back to me. “You know what that is?”

I nodded, not bothering to explain why.

He spun on his heel, pacing toward the shoulder of the road. “The border to the fae land was marked by those who knew enough about it, and the name stuck, changing, after they’d all gone to dust.” He spat on the blacktop. “Then some dog-buggering half-wit built a road here, since the markers were already there. No one remembered that they were meant to show you where not to go.”

“Sounds like the sort of thing someone would do,” I said. “And I suppose I get why we’re here.”

“Do you.” Brock wandered in a wide circle around us.

I didn’t bother answering him. ”What’s next?”

Bhuto studied me for a moment. “That is something you will tell us, Sean.”

I raised an eyebrow at him. “Really?”

”Understand, we are here to help you, but we are also here to help your father, and we could not — can not — do that without you.” The ogre pointed to me with a knobby finger that ended with an elegantly painted claw. “You are our link to him.”

I looked up at the stars, letting myself marvel for a second at how many more there were away from the city, then blew out a breath between my teeth.

“Okay,” I said, “what do I do?” I was looking at Bhuto, but he gestured to Brock.

Brock was holding a silver needle.

Posted in: Excerpts, Writing.

Vayland Rd. [4] — The Talk

~ The Talk ~

“ …it wasn’t your imagination. The plains are thick with goblins, especially along those dark gullys and river bottoms where no man has traveled in a thousand years. The natives learned to avoid the areas and the white settlers soon after. There are goblins and ogres all along there. No trolls though, no trolls…”

– transcript of a raving madman in Watertown, SD

I don’t know how long I sat on the deck. The moon wasn’t bright, and the lights were off in the house by the time I pushed myself to my feet and kneaded my back which was still pissed about the sixteen hour drive. I hadn’t slept since the night before last.

Somewhere in mid-stretch, I realized I wasn’t alone. I’m not sure what gave me the hint, but when I turned the direction my intuition pointed, there was a shadow where there shouldn’t have been in the treeline next to the house.

“Who’s there?” I said, glancing around the deck for some sort of weapon.

The voice that spoke was gutteral in a way that made me realize I’d never truly understood the word. “We’re not your enemy, Sean.” The large not-supposed-to-be shadow split into two: one shorter than me and one… still quite large. The shorter one spoke again. “We’re after the things that took your father.”

“Things?”

“Dirt-eaters.” He sounded hungry when he said it. He sounded like he was smiling.

There was a long pause while I searched for an appropriate response.

“You are directly the fuck out of your mind, aren’t you?”

The larger shadow snorted in amusement. It sounded like a prize bull huffing to scare off predators.

“You father’s missin’, yes?” The short one said.

“My dad, yeah. What do you know about it?”

“We know who did it.”

“Call the cops.” I thought about it. “Or turn yourselves in.”

The air actually got chilly. “You think we did it?”

I shrugged at the open night, wondering if they could even see it.

“You think we’re… dirt-eaters?” There was movement I caught only a bare second before the speaker was holding me by the shirt and pressing me against the side of the house. I looked down into a face a good foot and a half lower than mine, covered in random smears of grease that ran into his hair and beard. The knotted tree-branch of the arm that held me was covered in grease as well, or tatoos, or both. His eyes were bright in the moonlight and I could hear his teeth grind.

“Brock.” The larger shadow, still standing near the trees spoke softly, but his voice seemed to vibrate in the ground. “He did not mean anything by it. Let him go. You’re choking him.”

The voice was right; I couldn’t breath, but not because of the hand on my chest — the stench of sweat and oiled hair surrounded the short bastard in a miasma that made my eyes water. “Take…” I managed to choke out.

“Whazzat?” He growled in my face. His breath was a whole new color in the bouquet surrounding him.

I shoved sideways on his arm as hard as I could, using whatever leverage advantage that my height gave me, and staggered away from him. “Take a damn bath, you putrid son of a bitch.”

Another pause, this one broken by a deep chuckle from the trees that his partner on the deck joined in on. I glared while the chuckling died down. “Yeah, I’m hilarious, I’m sure. Who the hell are you?”

“Allies, if perhaps not friends.” The large shadow took a step that carried it into the moonlight, and nearly to the edge of the deck.

It held a spear in its left hand and stood close to nine feet tall, but I found it hard to focus on anything past the curving horn in the middle of its forehead.

—-

Steven stared through the bars of his cage, looking at stars exactly the same as the ones he knew.

Which made it worse.

He didn’t feel the pain. He knew it was there, but it wasn’t active unless he tried to scrape away the mud. They definitely didn’t want him to touch the mud. He watched the stars and tried not to think about the sunburn feeling that itched along his skin.

“It’s alright…”

He jumped away from the sound behind him and turned. The space behind his cage was shadowed darkness but he could make out some kind of movement. He thought for a minute that someone had found him until he realized that the movement was constrained by a cage like his own.

“Who’s there?” He tried to keep his voice pitched low.

“T- ahh…” There was a long pause. “Ted… Schafer? Do you know me?”

He did, although not well. Schafer and his wife were supposed to have auctioned their farm and declared bankruptcy a month ago. Folks said they’d moved.

“I know you. What–”

“It’s alright.” The voice in the shadows continued while a hunched form Steven couldn’t make out shifted uneasily within. “It’s alright if you want to… make noise. I watched them put the needles on you, and the mud. I know — know what it feels like for you right now.” The shape shuffled back into the shadows. The voice already sounded tired. “I just wanted to tell you that it’s alright.”

Steven watched the shadows for a moment in silence, then turned his back on the voice and sat back down.

“Hell if it is.” He murmured to the stars. “Hell if it is.”

—-

“So…” I said, sitting on the back of a tractor in the machine shed and watching my ‘guests’, “you’re a dwarf from the nordic wastelands who’s been fighting your ancestral enemy–”

“Dirt-eaters,” Brock growled helpfully.

“Whatever.” I turned to his monstrous companion. “And you…” I’d somehow managed to miss that it was wearing full fifteen-century samurai armor, but in my defense it was nine feet tall and did have a damned horn sticking out of it’s forehead. “You’re some kind of ogre wizard –”

“Magi” it corrected.

“– Magi who’s been working with him for how long?”

The creature made a dismissive gesture and stepped toward me. “The duration of my partnership with Brock is not relevant, Sean.  What is relevant is our partnership with you, one which can save your father. Also, please call me Bhuto.”

I stared at the proffered hand — one that could easily palm my skull — and shook my head blankly. It was withdrawn.

“What kind of partnership?”

Bhuto straightened and adjusted his armor. “The only one which can save you father from these –” he used a word that slid away from my mind like oil. “We should travel as I explain.” He appraised me. “Do you have a weapon?”

For the first time in two days, I felt like smiling.

Posted in: Excerpts, Writing.

Updates for the week of 2010-02-07

  • 24 hrs after it went out, Macmillan imprint sites finally post Sargent's letter publicly. Elegant illo of how/where e-consumers rate. #
  • My thoughts on the Macmillan-Amazon thing, now with 65% less apoplectic swears. http://is.gd/7qwK8 #
  • What’s been gnawing at me lately (http://goo.gl/AHJ7) – Read the postscript for good thoughts on current dust-up. (Thanks @glecharles.) #
  • It's mildly depressing not getting along/agreeing with people I admire. I realize it breeds healthy debate; doesn't mean it's fun. :/ #
  • RT @indieauthor: Why aren't authors irked @ Macmillan instead of Amazon? Higher #ebook price doesn't = better royalty, just fewer purchases. #
  • RT [Best summary I've read, including my own.] @DaphneUn RT @NathanBransford: The Kindle Missile Crisis explained: http://bit.ly/ba9sEA #
  • It's exhausting, caring about whether or not publishing improves its structure. Also unrewarding. Resuming other activities. #
  • Adrift: Deirdre says that if the station was banning me or Jon because it thought we were Scourge-infected, I woul… http://bit.ly/bkF3So #
  • Digital Perception (http://goo.gl/Xpyi) – "… the way to fight piracy is with cost and convenience." #
  • Did I just… yeah. I just rickrolled myself while dreaming. #canteventrustmyownbrain #
  • RT @glecharles: Libraries are being strangled to death, given no chance (or funding) to transition into digital age. Criminally negligent. #
  • RT @glecharles: RT @DigiBookWorld: "President budget freezes libraries; omits school libs from ed increase" @ala_wo http://bit.ly/aFlLhT #
  • RT @crredwards: Hitler responds to the iPad – http://bit.ly/92K9Dt #
  • RT @ChuckWendig: Sometimes, you creative-types need an ass-smacking. http://tinyurl.com/yftf25e ("Writers Don't Do That" #terribleminds) #
  • Who will save us? (http://goo.gl/jM2Z) – "If you mean, 'what will keep things as they are?' the answer is 'nothing will'." #
  • Thought-food: http://bit.ly/9ZeSxV 80% valid, but WHAT is 'competitive and diversified' about Big 6 dictating e-retailer pricing? #
  • A Call For Author Support (http://goo.gl/krLx) – "When Elephants fight, it's the grass that gets trampled." #
  • Avatar Review (http://goo.gl/qmgs) – From the guy that brought you the 7-part breakdown of Phantom Menace. #
  • Late start to the day. Going to be a late end to the day, also, so I figure my karma is good. #
  • Adrift: The station, still eavesdropping, corrects Deirdre: she isn’t Scourge-infected – it’s not a disease. By it… http://bit.ly/cVmCL4 #
  • I shout the shouting out: @ChuckWendig paints with shotguns http://tinyurl.com/yjoecq9 #terribleminds #
  • Fun with punctuation (http://goo.gl/Skfm) – I'm doing revisions this week, so this is a good reminder. #
  • Working on short story edits/rewrite. Goal is to improve it (duh) and cut 10%. Dunno if it's any better, but Twitter does really help me wi #
  • People: "Problematic" means indefinite, unsettled, uncertain, questionable, doubtful… NOT "a problem". #newpetpeeve #
  • Put another way: ""That's problematic." != "That's a problem." Quit effing using it that way. #
  • Adrift: Station says that “The Scourge” isn’t something you catch, but something you are. It scanned Deirdre and g… http://bit.ly/aHVBdf #
  • RT @brennanrtaylor: "She's a witch–burn her!" = "He's a terrorist–kill him!" What country do I live in, again? http://bit.ly/cFdg4C #
  • MY daddy eats super-faster than _anything_. Like, a *100* fast: dinner's already gone! #thingskayleesays #braggingdadupatschool #
  • Adrift: Sorry, but what the glittering hell does getting a ‘nominal match’ mean? A theoretical match? A match that… http://bit.ly/97V3dl #
  • Al Franken Makes Comcast's CEO Look Like A Tool (http://goo.gl/DDO6) – I'm am so impressed with this junior senator from Minnesota. #
  • *Banghead* ow *Banghead* ow *Banghead* ow *Banghead* ow *Banghead* ow. Good parts of the evening are Good. Less good parts? *Banghead* ow. #
  • Wasn't there an energy-sucking sponge in an old Monster Manual? Did Erol Otis' line drawing look at all like the new CIA guy in Chuck? #
  • RT @jchutchins: WHY AKIRA MATTERS — Great 2:15 video about the art/animation of AKIRA, and why you should care: http://bit.ly/bOBIQk #
  • RT @Danisidhe: You know what? Until other people stop fucking things up, I'm taking 'control freak' as a compliment. #thisshouldbeatshirt #
  • RT @saucy_dryad: Preparing dinner is considerably more exciting when you snarl, "WHO'S NEXT?" at every step. #
  • RT @ebertchicago: Teabaggers: By all means, a civics and literary test before voting. That would wreck the Right. #
Posted in: Untidy Heap.

Vayland Rd. [3] – The Cage

~ The Cage ~

Steven didn’t want to wake up; sometimes you know things aren’t going to be good when you open your eyes.

On the other hand, better to see the trouble coming than get hit by it. He shook his eyes into focus and looked around, then shook his head again and squinted.

The sky was the color of an old bruise — solid cloud-cover in dusty grays and purples from one end of the sky to the other — but that wasn’t really the problem; in fifty years you can see some pretty odd weather kick up.

The problem was, he was looking at the battered sky through the bars of a wooden cage. Worse, the cage was in the middle of some kind of camp. There was a fire burning a few feet away, cooking something that smelled like rotten corn silage in a pot almost as big as the cage he was in, and there were about a dozen little huts around him that looked like they were made out of sod.

The people walking around, including the two looking at him in the cage, were short little wiry bastards with dried mud caked all over their skin.

And they didn’t look like right at all.

—-

He tried to get loose when they opened the cage doors, but they were strong and there were a lot of them. They pulled him to a stunted, leafless tree that stood in the middle of the camp, and tied him too it. The rope they used was never intended for this purpose; over an inch thick with harsh bristles jutting from the weave like thorns, it chafed his skin even when he didn’t move. They wrapped him in a coil from shoulders to knees, leaving him with his back pressed to the surface of the dead tree. The knots required by the thickness of the rope were twice the size of his fist.

Two of the… things, walked up to him after he was secured. Their noses were about three inches too long, same as the chins, and what skin he could see where mud had flaked away was the same color as the sky. Their eyes were the black of used forty-weight oil.

Not human. Sean would know what to call them, probably; he sure as hell didn’t. He’d hoped he was dreaming, but he knew himself well enough to know he’d never come up with something like this.

The taller one (a little more than four feet tall, and not quite as bowlegged) spoke, phlegm rattling in the back of his throat like the sound of a kid’s straw that’s hit the bottom of a chocolate malt. “You the man Steven. You ours now.” The second one sniggered, and Steve was sure he saw the first one twitch in annoyance.

“I’m not a damn thing to you. Let me go and I’ll be on my way.”

The rest of the crowd around him murmured when the first one nodded, acting as though he’d expected that answer.

“Good. Fight is good.” He gestured to the second one, who stepped forward and unfolded a cloth on which he laid out the first bright or clean things Steven had seen in this place.

Needles.

—-

They rearranged the ropes so they could get easy access.

That was necessary; the needles weren’t very long, just thick.

He’d tried keeping track of how many they’d driven into him, but he lost count when they moved past his arms and shoulders and into the area between his collarbone and neck. It had all been very quiet, though; the things seemed very intent on what they were doing and aside from sucking his breath in past his teeth, he wasn’t making any noise.

Damned if he’d make any noise.

Eventually the sky was dark and they were done with the needles, finishing with his face — pushing the last few into the muscles of his jaw had almost got him to make a sound, but he hadn’t.

He hadn’t. He was sure he hadn’t.

He looked up to see the taller thing standing in front of him. Its lips were pulled back to damn near its rear molars in a dead man’s grin.

“Good. Ver’ good.” It nodded approvingly. “Strong.” It turned away. “MUD!”

The hell?

He had time to puzzle it over. Several of the scrawnier creatures began wrestling the foul-smelling pot off the fire, dragging it through the dirt toward him.

When they began to pack the hot, stinking mess onto his body, using the pins as anchors to prevent it all from sliding off, Steven still didn’t make a sound.

But it was much harder this time.

—-

It was starting to get dark.

It was starting to get dark and there was still nothing that made sense in any of this.

My family weren’t the sort of people who ended up interviewed about alien abductions in the Daily Sun; yet here I was, sitting on the back deck mulling over… what?

Muddy, barefoot footprints all around the back door — broad, flat things that made me think of Gollum. Smears on the windows that looked like finger marks with no prints. Drag marks heading toward the shelterbelt behind the house, before they vanished.

The kind of crap I used to think up.

Mom slid open the patio door and stepped into the gloom, her arms crossed as though she was cold. “You want anything to eat, bud?”

I shook my head. “Why’d you call me out here, Mom? I mean, I’m glad to be here and help you out, but what…” I let it go and shook my head again. It was quiet for several minutes, except for the sound of absent-minded bug swatting.

“I thought–” she started, then stopped. “I thought you might be… I thought you might know something.”

“About this?”

She sighed, and shrugged her shoulders in a way that seemed like an apology. “About… things that might help.”

I didn’t say anything to that. Eventually, she went back inside.

Posted in: Excerpts, Writing.

Vayland Rd. [2] – The Road

~ The Road ~

Churkk scowled.

“I like night, Churkk.  Dun like day.  Dun like heat or light or pantin’ or th’ way groud puffs up dust atcha when ya run.”

Churkk’s scowl deepened. He liked the night as well, but it irritated him to agree with the creature skulking alongside him.

“Night is cool.  Night is good.  Wraps us up and lets us come out of the cracks and up to see things.  What I think is the best is –”

“Jek.”

“Yeh?”

“Shut it.”

Jek did, looking suitably cowed.  He still walked alongside, however, and Churkk swore even the runt’s feet slapped on the ground different than anyone else.  Everything about Jek was annoying.

The light from a house poked through the trees at them, but rather than turning to go around it, Churkk took them in closer without explaining.  Slowly, they crept up to the corner of the building, then along a wall to the lit window.

Jek started to whisper a question, but stopped short when Churkk smacked him in the middle of his forehead without even glancing back to aim.

Inside, Churkk could see a people-room with things to sit on.  The woman sat on one, but didn’t see his long, mud-caked face at the window or the light glinting off his beady eyes, because she was crying — great, shaking sobs that shook her bent shoulders and moved her whole chair.

Churkk watched this for some time.  It made him smile.

—–

I lie to myself when I say nothing ever changes back at home — nothing ever seems to change in a place you lived for twenty years — but there were always fewer houses. Farming was a dying profession; every time I drove into familiar territory, the wide open plains seemed wider, flatter — less and less to do with people.

The road was mostly straight, rolling over gradual hills in what could often be an infuriating exchange of Passing and No Passing zones. It would start to wind soon. I knew this area; could still recite the mileage between every major and minor landmark for a hundred miles in any given direction, even landmarks that didn’t exist anymore, such as the old country school house that had apparently been torn down since my last visit and whose absence nearly made me miss my turn onto Vayland Road.

After a few miles, the curves began.

The farmland my family owned was on the high side of the county, raised above the lower, eastern half by a ridge of hills that Vayland Road crept along, curling around cuts in the earth that were somewhere between narrow valleys and broad ravines, filled with thickets and brush that by local wisdom wouldn’t even let a breeze through without a couple of good scratches. Gullys. That was the word.

I’d grown up riding in cars along this stretch of highway, then driving it myself, then driving away. The blacktop lead right past the farm’s driveway.

Mom was out on the front step before I got out of the car.

No one else was there.

Posted in: Excerpts, Writing.

Vayland Rd. [1] – The Call

[What follows is the first part of a short story I'm working on revising. The rest will follow over the next however-many-days-it-takes. I might put some editing notes in the posts' comments. If you're looking for such things, look for them there.]

Vayland Rd.

I remember, when I was a kid, riding in a car with green, leathery seats that got very hot in the sun. The car was green as well, although a different shade, and it seems to the me of my memories that most of the cars back then were that color. It was a popular trend, or maybe my child perception was skewed.

At any rate, the car was green, the seats were green, it was summer, the sun was hot, and the seats were hotter. We had the windows open to let the air in and my mom was driving to town on an errand.

The road was a winding black hardtop that looked down into sharp ravines between the hills; drops that seemed (to me) to go down and down farther than anything in the whole world. Every drive, I would look down and out from the tiny back windows of the two-door and think about what it would be like to go sailing off the road and into the ravines, tumbling over and over and finally exploding at the bottom, like on TV. A little morbid, but we lived a long way from any other kids my age — I had to make my own fun.

So, with the sun beating down and my boredom rising, when I saw a goblin shambling along the bottom of a ravine with an old, rusted sword balanced across his shoulders like the yoke of a wagon, I didn’t bother mentioning it to my mom. Even at that age, I assumed I’d imagined it.

I believed that for the next 23 years.

—-

~ The Call ~

My cell phone rang while I stood in line for lunch, the screen showing OUT OF AREA instead of a number. I thumbed it open to stop it from ringing and muttered a terse “This is Sean” into the mouthpiece, which usually clears up wrong numbers in a –

“Hey bud, how’re you doing?” My mom was only person in the world that called me ‘bud’, a lukewarm leftover from my preteen years that she tended to drag back out when she was feeling down.

“Hey, I’m good. What’s up? Something wrong?”

“Oh, you know…” Her voice wavered a little bit. A bad sound. I stepped out of line and headed for the door. “Been a little crazy here the last couple days.”

“What’s going on?” I didn’t try to keep the frown out of my voice; it wouldn’t make her feel any better if I did.

“Well, we can’t seem to track down your dad.”

I stepped into the watery sunlight and pressed the phone against my ear to block the white noise from passing traffic. “I lost you for a second. You can’t track down Dad’s what?”

“No, we can’t find him.” I heard her set something metal down on something solid. She was wandering around her kitchen, fiddling with things. It was a Tuesday. She wasn’t at work. “It’s been two days.” She paused. “Or four, I guess. Three and a half.”

I scowled at the pavement. “I don’t understand what you’re telling me. Is he traveling?”

“No, he’s been home for a couple weeks.”

“Did… what happened? Did you get in a fight or something?” It sounded surreal even as I said it.

No, of course not.” She, the properly-raised Midwestern wife, sounded vaguely insulted by the idea. “I went to bed a few nights ago and your dad stayed up watching TV. When I got up he wasn’t there. I thought he’d gone out to get some work done before it got hot.” I heard her move something else across the counter. “But he wasn’t.” Her voice crumbled, and she took a breath that sounded like a series of tiny gasps – the kind you hear little kids make between knee-scrape sobs.

She sniffed into the phone. “You still there?”

“What? Yeah.” I shook my head. “Quit… quit moving things while you’re on the phone — you can never find them later.”

“Okay.” Her voice was small and sounded further away than it should.

I let my eyes move from the sidewalk to the sky. “I’ll be there tomorrow afternoon.”

“Are you sure?” She sniffed again. “I know it’s a long ways.”

“Yes.” I made sure not to hesitate, but let my answer stand for both of her statements.

“Okay. Where should we pick you up?”

I started down the street, heading for the back parking lot. “You won’t, I’m driving out.”

“Oh honey, you can’t.”

“It’s the only way I can,” I replied, unable to keep the tightness out of my voice.

“It’s such a long ways.”

I checked my watch. “I need to get moving if I’m going to make this happen today. Okay?”

“Okay.” She’d given up arguing, which told me more about how bad it was.

“Call me if you find anything out. Be careful,” I finished, and ended the conversation wondering why I’d said it.

Several hours later, filling overnight bag and leaving messages with various people about an unspecified family emergency, I still didn’t know.

Posted in: Excerpts, Writing.

The Wonderful Stink of Revision

Did you read it?

No, not yesterday’s post; did you read something of yours? How was it?

Don’t tell me you’re not done reading it yet; you were supposed to pick something short.

And don’t tell me you didn’t have time; that’s your lack-of-grooveness talking. Make time. Read it while your significant other is doing a frame-by-frame live Tweeting of Lost or something. Time enough to accomplish The Reading exists, it’s just in the wrong box right now. Go get it.

So whadja think?

Needs some work, dunnit?

Good.

You’re gonna revise that sucker.

I know, I know: you’re out of the Groove. I’m saying “You need to revise,” and you’re all like:

...

...

Keep it simple. Have some clear technical goals in mind.

  • Find the spots where the story doesn’t seem to go into a scene long enough or far enough. Take it the rest of the way.
  • Fine the spots where your voice is muddied and indistinct. Clarify it. Clean things up. This is probably something you wrote awhile back, and you’ve learned stuff since then, so make use of it.
  • Kill adverbs. Rewrite the sentence so that you’re saying the same thing with better words.
  • The one scene that doesn’t seem to do anything? Take it out. This is your acid test revision: no less than 10% of the original text should hit the cutting room floor.

That’s the official list of goals.

But what you’re really doing is getting down in the muck, up to the neck, in your own writing. In you. Wallowing in the glory of your own wonderful stink.

That is your method, and it’s also your true purpose in this little endeavor. Yes, doing the revision will be nice, but your real goal here is to remind yourself why you like playing with words, and what all your favorite toys feel like.

Wallow. Get the mud in deep. Oink oink.

As a show of solidarity, I’m going to do a little public wallowing for the next week or so. My particular mud bath will be a short story I wrote a few years back called Vayland Rd. It’s a peculiar little thing I wrote as part of a 24-hour blogathon, so it’s about 7 tenths inspiration and 5 eighths exhaustion, but it came from a good place, I like the characters, and the story’s important to me.

As I revise, I’ll post a chunk of the yarn up here every day, so you all get something to read in between your own wallow sessions. Sound good?

Hope so, cuz it’s the best deal you’re gonna get.

Now get back to your wallowing.

Oink.

Posted in: Resources, Writing.

Getting back in the Groove: Reading your Favorite Writer

So it’s been awhile.

You had a good end of the year writing rush. You got your edits done and off to your writing group, your first readers, your second readers, your volunteer editing harem, maybe even your agent. You started a new project and lo and behold, THAT went well too.

Then the holidays snuck up behind you and kicked you in the spine.

Maybe there was travel. Gifts. Food. Possibly drink. More travel. A nasty head cold, some vomiting, and body aches topped off the festivities. Yet more travel.

Then you’re back home, and your day job would like very much if you could make up the time you just spent on the holiday break, without actually clocking any additional hours. Tax paperwork starts coming in. Your cold won’t go away. All those shows that conveniently went on break before the end of the year are back and broadcasting what feels like two new episodes a week and all your friends are talking about them and spoiling everything. The driver’s side windshield wiper starts tearing, your fifty thousand mile checkup is ten thousand miles overdue, and your kid wants to join ballet and karate.

You’re carefully sculpted writing groove caves in like a badly dug trench.

The situation grows more complicated.

The situation grows more complicated.

Now, please understand, when I mention a Groove, I’m not talking about a muse. I don’t believe in The Muse. A Muse. Whatever. Eff that nonsense right in the ear. Clinging to the ‘inspiration of the muse’ is some delicate, lacey bullshit (there’s a mental image) and I have no patience for it.

But there is such a thing as a groove, it is possible to get knocked out of it, and it can be a fucking drag to get back in there. Without some serious effort, it could take…

Well, honestly, it might never happen on its own.

This will not stand.

The mind-dulling blankness of January has gone by, and it’s time to dig your way back in there. Let the mud fly, people, and don’t worry about who else it hits.

What’s that? No shovel? Must you use your bare hands?

Ye–
Wait.

No. No you don’t. There are tools.

Read

It’s a simple thing to say, but one very pleasant way to make the mud fly is to read. If nothing else, it helps you remember the various cool ways those word things get strung together. Some of what you read will inspire you, some will amaze you, and some of it will, to put it bluntly, make you really really mad that you aren’t making a living as an author right now, because goddamn if you aren’t a hell of a lot better than this guy.

But I don’t need to tell you to read. You’re doing that already.

Right. It’s not the activity that I’m specifically talking about, it’s the author; what I need you to do right now is start reading your very very favorite author of all time.

You.

Now, I know what you’re thinking.

Man you're hard on yourself.

Man you're hard on yourself.

Why waste precious reading time on boring old you? Pay attention: you’ve been out of your groove for awhile, and while it’s great to read other fantastic and not-so-fantastic authors, it’s more important right now to remember your own voice.

Cuz you’ve kind of forgotten.

Which makes it really hard to jump back in and pick up where you left off.

So find something of yours. Doesn’t have to be super-polished. Doesn’t even have to be good. Probably shouldn’t really be that long, either.

Read it. Listen to that writer. See how they string the word things together. Get inspired by it, get amazed by it, and get angry at how much better you can do.

Let all the good and bad of the story soak into your winter-dry brain sponge. Let it percolate.

Tomorrow, you’re going to fix it.

Posted in: Musing, Resources, Writing.